life is hard.
i know we’re in the thick of retrograde season right now but damn, what the fuck is going on?
within the span of 3 weeks i’ve come to like 10 revelations, and all of them are life altering. i’m starting to question whether i’m the problem or if everybody else is, i got into an argument with my cat, & i still haven’t found a couch that suits my particular taste. i know that these are all amazing problems to have but i can’t help but to wonder if these feelings will ever go away..
it’s interesting to me how our brains can only adapt to whatever situation we’re living in in the moment. like, 6 months ago if you would’ve asked me how life was going i would have told you it was all sunshine & rainbows, i would tell you that i’d become more swift and that all the problems arose would just roll off my back. and now because i’ve had to swallow a few hard pills i’m convinced that the world is evil. (granted, i still think the world we live in sucks even when i’m in my happy go lucky moods, but i digress). times like these just make me think about how our brains are fairly simple machines with rudimentary mechanisms. out of sight = out of mind, going through a rough patch = life sucks forever, this boy told me he loves me = he really does - do i need to go on? all of this to say that our current situations & mindsets are all temporary. at any moment things are subject to change, & that’s just the way that life is.
i think i might be writing this for me more than anybody else, i mean who am i really convincing of anything when i’m speaking into the void?
life feels really hard right now, but then again i’m 22 years old, and this is my first time living this little life of mine… i’ll be okay. (hopefully)